I have a head like a cat, feet like a cat, and a tail like a cat, but I am definitely not a cat. What am I?

I have a soft, fluffy tail, I love hoarding garbage in your attic, and I think your expensive electrical wires are a delicious gourmet snack. What am I?

I have no voice, yet I can tell you every secret of the universe, introduce you to dragons, and take you to distant galaxies in total silence. What am I?

I have a face that never frowns or smiles, and two hands that never clap. What am I?

I have a spine, but I have no internal organs, no bones, and I never tell a joke, yet people love opening me up. What am I?

I can catch a runaway train, hold a heavy ocean liner in place, and yet, I am easily thrown away when you are done sailing. What am I?

I am a master of disguise who wears a bright neon vest, stands on the side of the highway for hours pretending to hold a sign, and yet every single car in a three-mile radius suddenly slams on their brakes the moment they spot me. Who am I?